Great joke that I came up with in 5 seconds

Why did the cup of milk turn himself into yogurt?.....
Because he wanted to be more cultured.

This is not a resolution!

I want to start off by saying this is not a new year's resolution but I want to lose weight! I currently weight between 218 and 222 lbs and I need to get below 200, preferably 190.

So here we are in January and I weight 220; if I want to be 190 by, say, June I need to lose about 5 lbs a month.